Gaucho Marks

Gaucho Marks

UCSB Satire For the People, By the People

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Category: Local

Eric Cartman wearing a Hitler uniform sits on a stool next to Charlie Kirk on stage
March 1, 2023March 2, 2023 Gaucho Marks

Charlie Kirk Reveals Surprise Guest Eric Cartman at UCSB Event

Here's how YOU can stand up to the Australian Annexation of UCSB! A UCSB student is seen throwing a koala into a eucalyptus tree like a basketball.
November 4, 2022 Gaucho Marks

Australia Annexes Central Coast, Too Many Eucalyptus Trees

Dead seabird on the beach with a Shen Yun flyer sticking out of its belly
May 20, 2022May 17, 2022 Gaucho Marks

Over 85% of Ocean Trash Shen Yun Adverts

Digital illustration of blonde white frat boys coming off a factory conveyor belt.
April 18, 2022November 4, 2022 Gaucho Marks

Frat Factory Faces Supply Chain Shortage on Justins, Ethans, Tristans

February 7, 2022February 11, 2022 Gaucho Marks

Charles Munger Presents: The Mungie Awards

January 26, 2022November 4, 2022 Gaucho Marks

Netflix Acquires Gaucho Marks in $2.8T Deal

May 26, 2021November 5, 2022 Gaucho Marks

Sadboi Vibes Presents: EDC at the Beach!

April 19, 2021November 5, 2022 Gaucho Marks

That Big Boat Is Now Stuck in the Campus Lagoon!

October 23, 2020November 5, 2022 Gaucho Marks

Isla Vista Halloween-at-Home Survival Guide

April 21, 2020November 5, 2022 Gaucho Marks

Quarantine Recipes: Tomato and Egg Stir Fry

February 24, 2020November 5, 2022 Gaucho Marks

An Open Letter to the Girl Who Keeps Raising Her Hand in My GE Class

February 13, 2020February 13, 2020 Gaucho Marks

An Interview With a Raccoon

February 10, 2020February 9, 2020 Gaucho Marks

Cats: A Eulogy

November 14, 2019November 5, 2022 Gaucho Marks

Sugar Daddies Reign Supreme at Top of Food Pyramid

November 6, 2019November 2, 2019 Gaucho Marks

La Croix, Le Fraud: An Almost Truthful Tale

November 4, 2019October 29, 2019 Gaucho Marks

Ranked UCs Ranked by Stereotype

October 31, 2019October 28, 2019 Gaucho Marks

Feline Fatale: We’re All a Bunch of Mountain Pussies!

October 29, 2019October 29, 2019 Gaucho Marks

The Four Orientalist Horsegirls of Halloween

October 24, 2019 Gaucho Marks

Airpod Serling’s No Flex Zone

October 22, 2019October 22, 2019 Gaucho Marks

Things Elizabeth Warren Doesn’t Have a Plan For

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"That must mean they're all virgins, right? Nothing else could possibly explain it, right?" said project leader Sophie Papermann. PLEASE I’M A STAAAAARRRRRRRRR “I just wanted to learn more about the nuances of toilet paper brands and manufacturing… I thought this was a Kirkland Signature event,” confessed the confused connoisseur. “Those guys on stage clearly didn’t know crap about the industry. What a flush!” 💩🧻 For more groundbreaking journalism, visit our website: gauchomarks.com “Eric and I share a lot of the same hardworking American values that makes this country great. He’s a model citizen that gives me hope for the next generation. It’s been a pleasure to have him here on the stage tonight, what a great and heartwarming kid. We sure owned those liberal cucks, didn’t we, Eric?” Happy leap day everyone! 🍀🥸 #ucsb UCSB Housing & Residential Services stated on the matter: “You may find SEAL’s Fraternity & Sorority Life Councils to be helpful in finding the housing option that is right for you.” UCSB’s second flash flood warning of the quarter! This must be some kind of record! Stay safe out there… 🌊 Got any Valentine’s Day plans?😜 The RCSGD has a new resource guide some of you may find useful. I know our staff will be putting these tips to good use in the near future… Check the link in our bio for more deets, ya filthy animals!💋👅

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