Many of us have a hard time keeping up with the Wide World of World Wrestling Entertainment (WWWWE). Here is a list of the 13 biggest events from yesterday:

1. No one has bothered to move the dead moose from the ring.

2. Wrestlers Adolph Hitler and Super Rabbi have finally managed to put their differences behind them.

3. Wrestler Miles Davis has returned from the grave, and he smells significantly worse.

4. Wrestler Neanderthal Ned has also returned from the grave and smells significantly better.

5. Someone keeps throwing baked potatoes into the ring, and they’re not even seasoned.

6. Wrestler Dracula Dan has choked on his own fog machine, and he will never be alive again.

7. Scandal! Wrestler Stephen Speilberg admits he does not know what a camera is.

8. Scandal! Audience member throws shoe at head of wrestler George “The Bush” Bush.

9. Scandal! Wrestler Zachary Taylor has died of milk related complications.

10. Wrestler Dracula Dan has come back from the grave and doesn’t smell like anything at all.

11. Wrestler Gary has forgotten his Netflix password.

12.  Heartwarming! Wrestlers Adolph Hitler and Super Rabbi are now sharing a Netflix account.

13. Many are reporting hearing the sound of the moose’s ghost. This is of great concern to the Wide World of World Wrestling Entertainment because he has not bought a ticket.